Introduction
Being asked to be a bridesmaid is a big deal. It means you’re someone the bride truly loves, trusts, and wants right by her side on one of the biggest days of her life. It’s an honour, yes, but let’s not pretend it’s not also a bit of a mission.
As a Melbourne-based celebrant who’s seen a lot (and I mean a lot) of wedding parties in action — the good, the chaotic, and the gloriously helpful — I’ve picked up more than a few insider tips. If you’re wondering how to nail your role and be the kind of bridesmaid people toast for years to come, this one’s for you.
And, yes, you also want to look fabulous (like our bride, Lauren, and her bridesmaids whose gowns were designed and created by the talented Josephine from Romeo Bastone Couture) while you support the bride.
Here are 7 ways to be the best bridesmaid ever without losing your mind or your sparkly heels.
1. It’s Her Day — Not Yours
Let’s start with the biggie. Weddings can stir up all sorts of emotions and sometimes even a little drama. But as a bridesmaid, your #1 job is to support the bride. That doesn’t mean saying yes to everything or being a doormat (not on my watch), but it does mean being aware that this isn’t your show.
If she wants blush pink even though you’d rather wear black? Wear the blush. If she’s stressed about table arrangements and just needs someone to nod and say, “You’re doing great”, be that person.
Trust me, I’ve seen bridal parties who made it about themselves... and others who lifted the bride right up. The difference? Massive.
2. Be a Communication Queen
Group chats, spreadsheets, countdowns, fittings, hen’s parties, timelines… being a bridesmaid can come with admin. Don’t ghost the planning process. If the bride or maid of honour is organising things, respond quickly and kindly — even if it’s just a “Got it, thanks!”
One of the biggest stressbusters for couples I work with is knowing their crew is on board and responsive. You don’t need to be the organiser (unless you are the MOH), but being someone the bride can count on to reply, show up, and not make her chase you? That’s gold.
3. Keep the Vibe High — Especially on the Day
The wedding day is electric and sometimes nerve-wracking. One of the best things a bridesmaid can do is be a calm, positive, present energy. The bride will pick up on your mood, so channel your inner Zen.
Pack snacks and water for the getting ready room (no one’s fabulous when hangry). Be ready with tissues, touch-up kits, a Spotify playlist, and hilarious memories that keep her smiling.
At almost every wedding I do, it’s the bridesmaids who set the tone in the lead-up to the ceremony. If you’re calm, joyful, and present? That feeling ripples out.
(Also – quick plug: if I’m the celebrant, I’ll always chat to the bridal party beforehand, so don’t be shy to ask me where to stand or what’s next. I’ve got you.)
4. Don’t Disappear After the Photos
This one’s more common than you’d think. Once the ceremony is done and the photos are taken, some bridesmaids vanish into party mode. You should absolutely enjoy yourself (hello, bubbles and dance floor!), but don’t totally check out.
The bride might still need a hand with bustling her dress, grabbing her flats, fixing her lipstick, or fielding questions from guests.
A little “You good? Need anything?” goes a long way. You don’t need to hover — just keep your Bridesmaid Radar on for the rest of the day.
5. Be the Emotional Safety Net
Weddings can bring up all sorts of unexpected emotions: family tensions, weather stress, even the weight of “holy heck, I’m getting married today.” Sometimes, the bride just needs someone who’ll take her hand and say, “You’ve got this. Let’s take a breath.”
Being that person — the calm in the storm — is one of the most beautiful ways you can show up. You don’t need to fix everything. Just listen, breathe with her, and remind her what the day’s really about: love.
6. Respect the Budget, Boundaries, and Bride
Bridesmaids’ duties come with costs: dresses, shoes, accommodation, events, travel. If something’s outside your budget, speak up early and kindly. Clear, respectful communication avoids awkward tension later.
Also, be mindful of boundaries. If she wants a chilled hens instead of a wild weekend, respect that. If she’s doing things differently, lean into it. It’s the modern era — no one-size-fits-all wedding.
And yes, please be on time to everything. No bride wants to stress about someone missing hair and makeup or holding up the ceremony (I’ve seen it. Not cute).
7. Celebrate Her Love Story
This is the fun bit and the heart of it all. The best bridesmaids are genuinely into it. They ask questions about the ceremony, they cheer like mad when the couple is announced as married, they cry happy tears when the vows get real.
Let yourself feel the feels. Show up in the moment. Be proud to be there, not just because you’re in the bridal party, but because you believe in the love story that got you all to this day.
If you're lucky enough to witness a ceremony crafted with care (shameless nod – that’s what I do), it’ll be full of the couple’s personality and history and all the little quirks that make them them. Be present for it. It’s magic.
Be the Best Bridesmaid or Maid of Honour
Being a bridesmaid isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being present, supportive, genuine, and kind. It’s about showing up for your friend in a way that says, I love you and I’ve got your back.
And when you do that? You’re not just a good bridesmaid — you’re unforgettable.
Want more ceremony or wedding party tips? Explore our Hints and Tips Page, waving our metaphorical pom-poms and celebrating love in all its forms. Whether you’re in heels or gumboots, you’ve got this. Celebrate your bestie.
About the Celebrant Featured in This Article
This post was written by a Melbourne-based celebrant featured by Wedding Services Melbourne (WSM) — a community of trusted wedding professionals serving Victoria’s couples and vendors alike.
One standout member is Julie Byrne, a well-loved Melbourne wedding celebrant known for creating personalised and fun-filled ceremonies for couples that guests rave about. Learn more about Melbourne Celebrant Julie.